Hey there, and it’s been a while since we’ve done one of these. Has it been three months or four? No matter. A lot has happened since then.

Let’s start off by mentioning the fact that while I was away Americans collectively lost a few more brain cells. See what happens when I’m not here to keep people on their toes. There was a poll about a month or so ago that said 50 percent of Americans now believe that they found Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq. That was up from the 35 percent that we had been averaging for a long time. You know which ones those 35 percent are, don’t you? They’re the ones who would pluck the hairs out of George Bush’s butt with their teeth if he asked them to.

I haven’t checked to see if Faux news ratings are up which might help explain the sudden jump. I know that most people who watch Faux news on a regular basis have always believed they found WMD’s, and that Sadaam Hussein was personally responsible for 9/11. You might have expected that 35 per cent to go down eventually as some of those who watch Faux finally found their brain lying on the floor or on the closet shelf where they might have left it, or maybe even up their ass where it really is. But for that percentage to increase back up to fifty per cent does nothing but tell me that half the population of this country has the IQ equivalent of Francis the Talking Mule or Mr. Ed. I don’t like insulting half of my fellow citizens but sometimes you just got to call them as you see them.

So last week during a press conference, the idiot-in-chief was asked what Saddam Hussein had to do with 9/11. His answer? “Nothing….but” Yes of course he answered correctly but threw in the usual qualifying double talk gobbledy gook so that those 50 percent who are still looking for those WMD’s will keep on looking. Has anybody checked the orifices of Bill O’Lielly and Sean Hamitup yet? If you need help I’ll send you a flashlight.

The thing is, even if the idiot-in-chief had stopped at the word “nothing” it still wouldn’t matter. Most of the 50 per cent WMD crowd were probably too fixated on the new found celebrity status of accused Jon Benet Ramsey kind of confessed killer Jon Mark Karr for the remark to even have registered. The rest were worried about which one of the ho bags Flavor Flav was going to kick off his show Flavor of Luv, how much weight Tina Yothers was going to drop on Celebrity Fit Club, or whether they might finally see a picture of the mysterious and secretive Suri Holmes Cruise whose father was given the ax last week by Paramount.

Speaking of Faux, I found this list of most outrageous things that people who watch Fox new believe posted over at News Hounds last night. A few of the items:

Missing white women are considered 'hard news'.
Neil Cavuto runs a buisness show.
Neil Cavuto isn't a sleaze ball pervert.

Bill O'Reilly isn't a sleaze ball pervert.
Dick Morris isn't a sleaze ball pervert.
9/11? Clinton's fault.
Bin Laden not being captured? Clinton's fault.

Faux News reports both sides of the story.
Democrats are waging a war on Christianity.
There is in fact a 'Culture War'
The Christian Right are sane.

You can read more in the response to this bit about how Ann Coulter got her tidy widy’s all in an uproar when some at Faux forgot to tell someone else that talking over a Repugnican Slime ball with facts is not allowed.

I can almost hear Jack Nicholson yelling at her, “YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!”

Okay, how’s my favorite Repugnican, none other than Joe LIEberman doing? Well, he lost a primary while I was gone but that doesn’t deter good’ ol’ repugnican Joe does it? He just keeps right on going, spitting out those Dick Cheney type talking points as if it was Cotton Candy and sucking up to any Repugnican who crosses his path. He put out a new campaign ad after the primary but I didn’t care for it much. I didn’t find it to be entirely honest so I fixed what needed fixing. Take a look:

Well, the Dems sometimes being the whimpering simpering cowering to the Repugnants bunch that they are, removed the ad for lack of balls. Soon after they did, that fine Senator from Ohio, Mike Deweenie, put one of those fine Repugnicant ads up starring a smoking and smoldering twin towers. Another thing about Mike Deweenie was that back when he was first running for the Senate he was going on and on and on about how people were becoming Congressmen and Senators and just staying there too damn long so people like him couldn’t have a chance. Well, Mike Deweenie finally got his chance, and in his second try ran for the Senate and won by telling people, by God, there will be term limits because by God no Senator should serve more than two terms. Of course you know and I know and Mike knew that you can run on things like that because their not really going to change how long Congressmen and Senators can serve without a constitutional amendment. And yeah you guessed it. Mikey is running for his third term.

So being the fair minded person that I am, I took the DSCC ad and reedited it to show how Repugnicans were hypocritical about these sorts of things. Of course that meant some Mike Deweenie bashing also. Of course that meant having to use part of Mike Deweenie’s ad to make my point. And what that all led to was having some Repugnicans bitch about it and had the ad and me kicked off of you tube supposedly for copyright invasion although I think it fell under the fair use doctrine.. But as you can see from the LIEberman ad, I will not be deterred. As for the Deweenie ad, if I can find a way to get it back up you’ll be the first to know.

Anyway, for now I’ll leave you with Lewis Black to wrap all this up and put a pretty bow around it. Catch you later.